13.

i am a child for thirteen more days. that's a weird concept. i can't say i think of turning 18 that way very often. but today i did. because i woke up at six to take my dad to chantilly because his car broke yesterday. then i went straight to school, came home, did my homework, went to work and as i pulled up to my house and noticed there were no cars in the driveway, i realized this is adulthood. or some form of it.
it's accepting responsibility where there are no questions you can ask. it's coming home to no one and that being okay. it's taking things for what they are worth and truly finding the beauty in devastation. it's only for a little while and we'll all be happy soon.

so in thirteen days i will be an adult. a naive, immature adult. i will act the same as i did when i was seventeen and now i can get in even more trouble for it. i want the world to know something and i can't say what it is. not because it's a secret but because it takes you so long to figure it out for a reason. because its one of those life lessons that you learn on your own and in your own way. the lesson is the same, what you learn from it was always intended to be your own.



also,
today i am grateful. to have my family, whoever they may be at this exact point in time. i am grateful for the chance to pursue an education in something that i love. i am grateful for the people in my life, even if they have small roles. i am grateful to be me, and to think the way that i do.
"you're only as good as the love you have for other people."
it's just a wednesday.


today i found out that we play TJ on my birthday. all i want from you boys is a win.




i have the whole entire world in front of me and i can make whatever i want out of it.