melatonin

is what your body releases to make you tired and i take it frequently these days. it's weird because im so tired all day long but need help sleeping at night. i wonder if too much melatonin fucks with you. i was going to just try to sleep but decided i wanted to blog instead. i've been pretty bad at blogging lately. like there's nothing really all that interesting to say anymore. there's this weird theme of fitting in in college and i seriously couldn't care less. i have friends nothing like the friends i had at home and its kind of weird, kind of bad, always good. the only thing i fear is that i'll get back to the dfgs and be so completely different. not dfg-like if you will. i guess it might not be able to happen either, because it really is where i came from. i wonder if we're annoying. someone, anyone give me input on if they find dfgs annoying. i got to college and found a group of girls that gave themselves a name (its an acronym, actually) and it just seems so silly. i bet people thought of us that way too. i like those girls though, theyre actually nice, individually at least.

i talk to my mom even less in college than i did in high school.

i moved to stone bridge four years ago today. or to lansdowne. well not today, it's past midnight. the 4th. i started at sb on october 10th. i'm glad i did that.


tonight i met a best friend(you're raised to that status now. i only really have a few)'s girlfriend and she's a very pretty girl. i hope she treats him well because if not it'll make him so sad. and that'll make me sad too. but it's so good to see a person so happy.




i wonder if i'll ever be happy like that here sometimes and then i realize that i forget the times i know i already am: